A midnight call

Discussion by a couple over mobile late at night.

WIFE : Where are you? Speaking so tensed. What happend???

HUSBAND : I’m in the car dear.
But the steering wheel, clutch pedal, brake pedal, accelarator pedal are all stolen from our car..
What to do now ??

WIFE : You drunk again??

HUSBAND : .A little… but how does that matter? Think about the car first dear.

WIFE : Expected.!! . You stupid idiot..!! Change from left seat to the right seat. You’ll find everything..!!!!

🍺🍻🍷🥃🍾
Nobody knows you better than your WIFE..😂

 

Boss should speak first

A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp.

They rub the lamp and a ghost appears. The Ghost says, “Normally one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each”.

So the eager senior manager shouted, I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries. “Tathastu”, and he was gone.

Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted “I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails. “Tathastu”, and he was also gone.

The boss calmly said, “I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch “.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Always allow the boss to speak first

 

What happens when you send a email to a wrong Id ?

See what happens when an email is sent to a wrong person :-

A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However,  he accidentally typed a wrong e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he pressed the “sent” button.

Meanwhile… .Somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband’s funeral. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting condolence messages from relatives and friends.

After reading the first message, she fainted. The widow’s son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To : My Loving Wife
Subject :  I’ve reached

I know you’re surprised to hear from me. They have computers here, and we are allowed to send e-mails to loved ones. I’ve just reached and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

Looking forward to see you TOMORROW!

 

Confidence

A hypothetical situation where 20 CEOs board an airplane and are told that the flight that they are about to take is the first-ever to feature pilot less technology: It is an uncrewed aircraft. Each one of the CEOs is then told, privately, that their company’s software is running the aircraft’s automatic pilot system. Nineteen of the CEOs promptly leave the aircraft, each offering a different type of excuse.

One CEO alone remains on board the jet, seeming very calm indeed. Asked why he is so confident in this first uncrewed flight, he replies:

“If it is the same software that is developed by my company’s IT systems department, this plane won’t even take off.”!!!!

That is called Confidence!!!

(coutesy : Silicon India)

 

Be well informed about your job

The following story shows how an opportunity came and also lost just because of lack of in depth knowledge of the job, a man is engaged. The story goes like this :

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road, he stopped and offered her a lift which she gladly accepted.

She got in and Crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely leg.

The priest had a look and nearly had an accident.

After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.

The nun looked at him and immediately said, “Father, remember psalm 129?”

The priest was flustered and apologized profusely.

He forced himself to remove his hand. However, he was unable to remove his eyes from her leg. Further on, while changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg again.

The nun once again said, “Father, remember psalm 129?”

Once again the priest apologized. “Sorry sister, but the mind is weak.”

Arriving at the convent, the nun got out, gave him a meaningful glance and went on her way.

On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up psalm 129.

It said, “Go forth and seek; further up, and you will find glory.”

MORAL OF THE STORY:
Always be well informed in your job, or you might miss great opportunities!

[ Courtesy :  Sanjana Shah, Mumbai ]